I was listening to the radio the other morning and they were asking the question, "What was the dumbest thing you have ever done?" I thought I would throw the same question out to my 7 readers and see what responses I get. I will tell you mine and hopefully get some good ones in return.
My roommates and I had an old couch we wanted to get rid of. We thought of numerous ways of disposing of this sofa, and the most logical one we came up with was to burn it. One evening Chuck, Wade and myself carried the couch outside for the big show. I am not sure which one of us had the idea to pour gas on the couch, but we all agreed it would help. Actually it did help and the sofa was burning just fine. The party started when a thought crept into my tiny brain to throw the last little bit of gasoline onto the fiery couch. In my hand was a milk jug with a few drops of gas left in the bottom, which I thought may make a quiet little boom and maybe a bright light. I tossed the jug from about 15 feet away as I would if I were pitching a slow pitch softball to Barry Bonds. Before the jug even reached the couch, the fumes ignited sending the jug like a rocket away from our house. As most of you know, if a rocket is going one direction, that means the fire boost is going the other. What I thought was my life flashing before my eyes, was actually a giant ball of fire heading directly towards my manland. By the grace of God my jeans were the only things singed that night. Emma is alive today thanks to that near miss, that's for dern sure!
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I had a summer job putting libraries together. We set up the 7-foot shelf dividers (the long, vertical pieces that hold shelves together) along the wall and were going to put them together when we had all the nuts, bolts, washers, etc. laid out. Remember, the dividers are not in any way connected with each other until they are assembled as one unit.
I am unpacking dividers and leaning them up against the wall, like always. I lean one against a wall, move 3 feet, lean another one, and so on. Once I get to a wall corner, I continue leaning dividers along the adjoining wall. By the time I'm done, there are 2 40-foot walls lined with dividers.
I kneel down to connect the first 2 dividers with a baseboard, but stupidly think that I can easily manipulate a 7-foot tall piece of wood by grabbing it AT THE VERY BOTTOM and twisting it. As it happened, I lost my grip on the divider and it tipped over, slamming into the divider next to it, which then hit the next divider, and the next ... like a bunch of 7-foot frickin' dominoes!
As if that weren't enough, when it got to the corner, the last divider along my wall hit the first divider of the adjoining wall; and proceeded to knock all those down one by one as well!
I think that was my last summer ...
When I was like 10, I thought it would be funny to throw hand fulls of rocks at cars that passed by on the road. I remember doing it one Sunday Night after church. Car after car, I threw those rocks like I was trying to strike out Barry Bonds.
Then one of those cars put on the brakes, turned around and came back. I hid in the pews of our auditorium for over an hour. That was plenty of time of the other kids to rat me out. After my dad got the driver calmed down and explained that he would handle the repairs, he came looking for me. I've never been more scared in my life.
I know how Adam and Eve felt...Genesis 3:8
"8 And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden."
Mine is similar to Mankin's. When I was in pre-7th grade summer break, some of my buddies and I decided it would be fun to burn G.I. Joe's in one of our backyards. Arsony must run in a guy's genes because it was sweet to watch those plastic action figures melt into puddles.
It was all well and safe until one of the guys brought out the gas can for a little extra 'pop' in our blaze. Pretty much as soon as he sloshed it on the mini-fire a huge flame burst out and caught my friend's younger brother on fire. I'll never forget him looking at us helplessly while he was actually aflame. Thankfully we knew to have him stop, drop, and roll, and he was de-lit in maybe 30 seconds.
However, after getting little bro extinguished, we realized the whole backyard was now on fire. The funny thing was that we were all MORE terrified of having the fire department come out and us get busted, than we were of any of us getting hurt. So we started running to the kitchen and grabbing cups and pitchers and pans full of water and then running out back and throwing it on the fire. After about 20 minutes it was out, and surprisingly you could hardly tell the yard had been used as a barbecue.
We thought all was clear until my friend's mother discovered burn marks on her son, and my buddy had to confess. It turned out that he had worse burns than his brother, which was probably retribution since he was the gas can wielder in the first place.
On 2nd thought, I'm not sure if I ever got busted and didn't get myself burned. So maybe it wasn't my stupidest moment!
I really don't have a story to share - although I've done plenty of stupid things in my life.
Right now I am laughing out loud at what has been written so far!!!
Guys are all pyros.
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